|
|
Post by VEDANT ONETTE on Apr 22, 2012 22:26:26 GMT -6
It was that feeling when your blood is cold, right? When your nerves are screaming at you because of the dumb shit you do. Where your fingers go numb out of fear.
Baltyr was feeling this surprisingly strong. Fear gripped him but he gritted his teeth and ignored it. He looked down at the transportalizer, the one with Anguis' symbol on it. Unfamiliar ground. Beyond it lay the section of meteor that was her territory- her replacement hive. The gray walls around him blurred as his mind lost focus of reality. He was going to have to bring this up sooner or later, and since Jack was after their asses it had better be now.
Who knows what the fuck would happen after they died?
He stepped on the portal and the chime letting the owner know of its activation went off. He blinked and he was in a new hallway, shades of gray and black predominant around him. His feet touched every second tile as he took steady strides, his fists clenched. His cheeks were slightly blue. He was definitely antsy about all of this. Where was she? He gripped his jacket closely to him, the simple black shirt underneath unfortunately not doing its job in keeping him warm. The fur tickled his cheeks as he shivered.
This was a stupid idea.
|
|
|
|
Post by anguis on Apr 22, 2012 23:40:03 GMT -6
That blood-curdling anxiety Baltyr was feeling? Anguis was excellent friends with that anxiety. She and the anxiety were on pet-nickname basis. She was essentially the anxiety's bitch and there wasn't a thing she could do about it. Fear lurked at the edge of her mind like the shadow in the alley wigglers were always told not to go near, and her hands were always trembling. Faintly bloodshot eyes darted from detail to detail and hyperspinning cogs in her brain were perpetually piecing things together, giving her ideas and theories and nightmares to make her scream and thrash in endlessly restless sleep.
But when she picked up the red chalk and etched a bright heart into the wall beneath yet another drawing of two of the trolls on the meteor with her, she was calm. Peaceful, even, and focused; her lips held the ghost of a smile that had not been seen since before the game started, and her stance was softer, her expression gentler.
It wouldn't last. It never did.
Anguis tensed as the transportalizer dinged and darted out of the back room of her respiteblock, dropping the chalk as she went and slamming the door behind her. Her mouth twisted into a scowl and she folded her arms across her chest not from the cold, which she was perfectly comfortable with despite her thin t-shirt, but from her deep-seated perpetual desire to curl up into a ball and vanish until all was right with the world.
She didn't. She stepped out to meet Baltyr, mentally bitching about his presence. Her eye twitched and she kept as far away from him as she could without absconding, avoiding the heat rolling off his body. Gog, he was a blue blood. He wasn't supposed to be that warm.
ANGUIS: What.
ANGUIS: You need ssomething? [/color][/center][/blockquote][/size] |
|
|
|
Post by VEDANT ONETTE on Apr 23, 2012 0:03:15 GMT -6
Baltyr stopped as their eyes locked. Damn- Anguis was pissed. He admitted that their time hanging out was in mid-game and before the session, she was always busy. He never really thought that she was like this all the time. Then again, they'd never really had a moment of peace right? Baltyr was spared a horrid life before Sgrub thanks to his lusus, who generally was a peaceful creature. And he had Vedant, who no longer existed. The few times they had seen each other before, she'd always been doing something... Yet Baltyr felt that he was closer to her than everyone else. Was it weird to think that she was the closest thing he had to a friend? The entire session he had been doing the heart shit yet he'd never really paid attention to what he felt. His heart was his power- he used it as a weapon, his aura being a thing of destruction. Despite that he could never really tell himself the truth of what he felt. He looked down to the floor to avoid her eyes. She had told him something a while back. About how when you hate somebody you would know. He'd gone through an entire session, so many hours fighting with his emotions just to ignore everything they told him. That was his thing right? Not giving a fuck- totally this troll's forte. Now his hair flew out in every direction revealing his dark eyes, slightly filled in around the pupils with his blood color- It was like the darkest sea, for speckles of blood shined when the light hit them. Around this time he would be in danger on Alternia- he was beginning to grow up. Soon he would have to leave as all adults did... If it still existed. Part of being an adult was not acting as if you had everything under control, right? There had to be chaos, it made things fun. The troll took a breath. ßaltyr: i...
ßaltyr: cant even talk right now [/color][/center] He shivered. His eyes met hers as he looked up and his right hand rose to his hair, where it found a mess of wavy, medium-length black mess. The expression on his face was severe, but it wasn't anger. Fear, maybe? Anticipation? Embarrassment? ßaltyr: y0u t0ld me that i w0uld feel with0ut trying
ßaltyr: and i never t0ld y0u h0w i felt
ßaltyr: even th0ugh i c0nsidered y0u a cl0ser friend than the 0thers
ßaltyr: i think i have flushed feelings f0r y0u [/color][/center] |
|
|
|
Post by anguis on Apr 23, 2012 0:48:03 GMT -6
Anguis's internal bitchfit wasn't caused by Baltyr's prescence, exactly; her issue wasn't with him. Her issue was with his being there at all. She kept herself holed up in her makeshift hive for a reason, and it wasn't to make people come visit her. She didn't like people and she tried to make damn sure that people didn't like her, either. Everyone was better off that way, she knew.
But it didn't work, obviously, because lo and behold, there was a blueblood standing right in front of her. And she didn't know what to do about it.
Anguis kept herself busy during the game, fighting the imps and her consorts and dealing with Nyx and trying to figure out how the fuck she was supposed to heal with the power of nothingness, helping out Adonis and dealing with Ariaqi and generally just doing shit wherever shit needed doing. She made as little physical contact with the other trolls as much as she could, preferring to move around and just keep herself available via Trollian. Needless to say, being thrown onto the meteor was a bit of a culture shock.
So she absconded the fuck away from everyone, venturing out only to 'accidentally' run into Caegar and get patched up by Adonis afterwards. She trolled just about everyone from time to time, but most of her conversations were just bitchfits and idle chatting with the clownbitch and dressboy and--
Well, Baltyr.
Anguis tightened her grip on her arms, her fingers pressing into the bandaged gashes on her biceps. Scratches laced her entire body, except for her face -- Caegar always left her face alone. Her lips were the exception. Bile rose in the greenblood's throat just thinking about it.
And then that bile threatened to come spilling out.
She stared at him unflinchingly, but retreated another step, her back pressing against the door she had slammed. She swallowed, her mouth suddenly dry, and she shook her head. A strand of hair caught on her chapped, broken lips. She brushed it away.
When Anguis spoke, her voice was hoarse from disuse.
ANGUIS: I can't.
ANGUIS: You know I can't.
ANGUIS: Fuck it wouldn't be right. [/color][/center] Anguis clung harder to herself, olive blood seeping through the bandages. She ignored it. Her nutrient sac threatened to fling itself out her mouth. She ignored that, too. ANGUIS: I'd be an awful matessprit and you know it.
ANGUIS: I'm not going to put you through that. [/color][/center][/blockquote][/size] |
|
|
|
Post by VEDANT ONETTE on Apr 23, 2012 2:04:03 GMT -6
The blue-blooded troll froze. He stood in the doorway to her hive, his eyes taking in the scene, yet his thinkpan never really registered it. He wouldn't go so far as to use highblood specifics- but his brain picked up on the chalk that was on the floor, of the green that blossomed across her arms as she flattened herself out against the door. He felt blue rise to his cheeks- he had to keep his walls up. Fuck feeling bad for any reason. Did courage even apply here? What was this sinking feeling in his chest? The troll found himself looking at his hands, heat blossoming from them- it wasn't the heat from his body, but his emotions doing the fandango around him. The Knight of Heart used his heart as a weapon and armor. It frenzied in an aura around him when out of check- The heat disappeared and Baltyr looked away from his hands, back towards his crush. Cold silence filled the room and Baltyr smiled. The fear was still paramount in his mind, the clawing in his stomach that wouldn't leave, and he had brief thoughts that maybe she didn't like him. She was the void- the static of the Eldritch gods. He could not feel her Heart like he could the others. He didn't want to move closer- she was already flipping out. ßALTYR: w0uldnt ße right
ßALTYR: i d0nt kn0w what that means
ßALTYR: i mean if y0ure n0t really flushed then thats c00l
ßALTYR: i cant feel y0ur heart like i can the 0thers
ßALTYR: y0u can thank the v0id f0r that
ßALTYR: s0 it was a sh0t in the dark... [/color][/center] His grin faltered. Emotions were hard. After Vedant died it seemed he had kinda holed himself up in a way. Taking steps out was like staring into the sunlit horizon after six months of night. Emotion hurt and blinded- but Baltyr refused to let that happen. He shrugged, a silhouette in the doorframe, staring across the hive. His right hand had a strand of dark hair taut, his left hand clenching the edges of his jacket. His cheeks were flushed with a slight blue as his smile turned into a grimace. ßALTYR: y0ure ßleeding again
ßALTYR: ang---> i dunn0 h0w y0u feel f0r me
ßALTYR: ßut i d0nt care if y0u think y0ud ße a g00d matesprit 0r n0t
ßALTYR: this guys a champ at n0t giving a shit rememßer?
ßALTYR: ßut i d0 think that if y0u d0 feel f0r me then y0u sh0uldnt ße afraid
ßALTYR: this shits freaky as fuck i admit
ßALTYR: ßut small steps and we can 0verc0me this heart stuff right? [/color][/center] He fished around in his sylladex, his emotions completely synced, and found what he was looking for. He summoned a box out of it- it was dark green, a surprisingly similar color to that of Anguis' blood. It was the color of Vedant's blood. While it wasn't the exact same it was of similar nature. The clasps fell and the top opened to reveal a small first aid kit- his moirail often obtained cuts while hunting in the woods. Baltyr had made sure to bandage his friend after his reckless escapades. Moirail and lusus, in a way. And now? Now he was offering his care to Anguis. His heart was pounding inside of his chest, his voice wavering as he looked at the bandages. The knight of heart. What did knights to again? He didn't think of them as fighters- more like protectors. And he wasn't happy about the smell of blood that was wafting his way. Damn, why did all this shit have to be so confusing? |
|
|
|
Post by anguis on Apr 23, 2012 2:56:31 GMT -6
Breathe in, breathe out. Do not pass Go. Do not collect two hundred boondollars. Absolutely do not proceed to flip the fuck out. Stay right where the fuck you are and breathe.
Anguis breathed. Her nutrient sac refused to unwind.
The heat stopped rolling off his body and she breathed again, a little easier. Her grip loosened and her arm throbbed.
The Void. Right. That empty black abyss she was supposed to have mastered -- that she guessed she did master, the way a Sylph was supposed to. Research and hard work gave her the Void, and she didn't even know what to do with it.
She breathed. Her voice was marginally less rapsy.
ANGUIS: It meanss that I can't do the sshit that matesspritss do.
NA: The cuddless and ssnuggless and whatever the fuck elsse you do when you're flusshed.
NA: I can't even do that and that iss like matessprit fucking 101. [/color][/center] Anguis laughed, humorless and dry and without even a hint of a smile. There was a reason she only had the caliginous quadrant filled. She was surprised she had even that much, sometimes. She didn't loathe anyone enough to warrant getting an auspistice, and she couldn't handle the touchy-feely shit of the flushed and pale quadrants. She was glad for the game, in a way. If Alternia hadn't been destroyed, she would've been culled as soon as she hit the proper age. Fucking conspicuous quadrants. Anguis blinked at the Knight and his first-aid kit, and looked at her bleeding arm. She laughed her not-laugh again and separated her arms, holding up the bleeding one and edging forward ever so slightly -- unspoken permission for him to do his thing. Adonis had patched her up countless times. This wouldn't be any different. ANGUIS: You know.
ANGUIS: For a champ at not giving a sshit.
ANGUIS: I feel like you're giving an awful amount of sshitss right now. [/color][/center][/blockquote][/size] |
|
|
|
Post by VEDANT ONETTE on Apr 23, 2012 20:44:51 GMT -6
Baltyr grinned as he discarded the bandages, revealing the scratches underneath. Fuck... Who could stand being Caegar's kismesis? Baltyr admitted that he wanted to wound some people, but blackroms held certain respects and he wouldn't go so far as to leave scars. To be honest the troll was just content knowing that she didn't want to kill him; in a way, Anguis was really keeping the mad beast at bay seeing as she seemed to hate everybody equally. He spread disinfectant across his fingertips, his hand finding her wrist. He withheld his emotion, his face expressionless as he ran the oil along the ravaged skin. His touch wasn't light but it wasn't rough either- the blue-blooded knight didn't expect her to enjoy it. The bandage was wrapped a little tight, but it would become more comfortable as she moved. And all of this was pointless, really- these wounds weren't enough to hurt anybody... Despite his lack of care for the other trolls, he wasn't afraid to be near them. He even enjoyed the company from a handful of them. Anguis had always been so detached from him, mostly because he couldn't decipher her. And the fact that she never really let anybody close. Baltyr wondered how close he let her kismesis. ßALTYR: ang im n0t expecting y0u t0 d0 anything great
ßALTYR: i w0nt f0rce my feelings 0n y0u f0r the real
ßALTYR: i mean i didnt even accept the fact they existed ßecause i suck at this shit t00
ßALTYR: i d0nt expect y0u t0 ße just s0me matesprit messiah
ßALTYR: mayße try t0 take it sl0w?
ßALTYR: ßut like i said--> y0u g0tta make the decisi0n
ßALTYR: ßecause i w0nt let y0u lie t0 y0urself t0 make me happy [/color][/center] |
|
|
|
Post by anguis on Apr 24, 2012 22:30:31 GMT -6
She stared at Baltyr's hands as they worked over her skin like they were part of some alien entity, with vague interest and blatant distaste. Most of her self-control was devoted to not cringing away; the rest was spent equally between not retching and not hitting something -- i.e. not hitting Baltyr. It wasn't personal; she just really disliked being touched.
Idly she looked at the cuts running down her arms. They were shallow, she knew, not that she would really care either way. Each one served as a mark that she could use to exact revenge on her kismesis; even if they weren't there physically, she'd still carry them around with her.
She flinched each time the disinfectant -- and the troll's fingers -- touched a new scraped-up area, and her scowl grew deeper. Her hands curled back into fists, her muscles tensing. The usual routine.
Anguis flinched again when he spoke, and ran her free hand through her hair.
She didn't have nearly enough middle fingers to express how she felt just then.
ANGUIS: Wow way to be completely undersstanding and make me feel like a huge bitch.
ANGUIS: Thankss. [/color][/center] Her scowl lifted into a smirk to let him know that she was just joking around because yeah, even pissy bitches can crack a few jokes every now and then. Even if this was a totally inappropriate situation for jokes. It occurred to her that maybe they -- everyone on the meteor -- maybe took themselves too seriously. Herself included. ANGUIS: Sso maybe if I wass not exactly.
ANGUIS: Inclined.
ANGUIS: Towardss a matesspritsship.
ANGUIS: With you.
ANGUIS: We'd sstill talk and sshit right?
ANGUIS: Becausse not gonna lie.
ANGUIS: If I had to choosse anyone on thiss asssswipe of a meteor for a matessprit.
ANGUIS: I'd choosse you.
ANGUIS: I jusst don't think that I'm exactly fit for picking anyone right now.
ANGUIS: Esspecially when I know my limitss and they aren't going to change anytime.
ANGUIS: Well.
ANGUIS: Ssoon. [/color][/center][/blockquote][/size] |
|
|
|
Post by VEDANT ONETTE on Apr 25, 2012 19:40:10 GMT -6
The blue-blooded troll just grinned as Anguis gave him a proverbial 'fuck you' with her thanks. He was a troll, right? It was his job to make life a little harder on everybody else. Pfft, as a highblood he was responsible for that. With all due seriousness though, he threw the jokes aside and took her point into consideration. All this heart shit, why was it so serious? Why did it matter so much in their culture? Was it about the Mother, or perhaps just finding the perfect other? All that Baltyr knew was that with twelve trolls, his chances at finding contentment were at an all-time low. Or was contentment even found in the quadrants? Emotions. Overrated. ßALTYR: y0 fear n0t
ßALTYR: im n0t g0nna ditch ya ßecause y0ure n0t digging 0n me l0l
ßALTYR: lack 0f fucks all ar0und
ßALTYR: were still c00l as shit
ßALTYR: im just kinda figuring 0ut whats up with me [/color][/center] It wasn't her fault for sure, and Baltyr could get the boundaries. He had a lot of his own. Like the ones with Caegar- jegus, she freaked him the fuck out. Like, maybe it was his weakness- people who were so driven like she was. So violent and physical. It was just some creepy shit. Baltyr was fine with just hiding in the background, watching from the shadows. Pulling the strings was his deal. To admit, he'd already started placing seeds with the humans. Soon he would find a way off of this desolate rock. Even if he had to be surrounded by like a completely different species. Unfortunately, that would be the moment that relationships went out the window. ßALTYR: hey imma head 0ut
ßALTYR: g0t a little w0rk t0 d0 f0 sh0
ßALTYR: and ßy the way-->
ßALTYR: alex is pretty damn c00l
[/color][/center] He had to admit, he'd found a human he didn't particularly hate. Maybe there would be more. With that, he waved and turned for exit. It was so odd- he'd walked in shaking, lying to himself, but when he could finally admit what he felt things had just... worked out so well. No more anxiety, no more fear. Just realization and a bit of wisdom. |
|
|
|
Post by anguis on Jun 10, 2012 20:40:54 GMT -6
Whatever human emotion or troll disease friendship was, Anguis thought she caught it. She liked Baltyr. He was relaxed, laid-back, giving zero fucks about anything or anyone. She didn't -- couldn't -- pity him, but... friends. Yeah. That could work.
Oh, who the fuck was she kidding.
Nothing ever worked out for her that easily. The clownbitch would get in the way just to spite her, or something would happen and Baltyr would die, or she just wouldn't be able to handle having and keeping anything but a kismesis.
Whatever. It'd be nice while it lasted. Maybe.
ANGUIS: ... Thankss.
ANGUIS: Really. [/color][/center] She snorted and shook her head, rubbing the back of her neck. Alex was everywhere, it seemed. Irons in the fire, indeed. Anguis waved as Baltyr left, feeling vaguely anxious but strangely calmed at the same time. At least the cuts would be better in a few days. Without him, she'd have left them under the soiled bandages to fester. ANGUIS: Yeah.
ANGUIS: For a moronic alien whore.
ANGUIS: He'ss pretty alright.
ANGUIS: Bye. [/color][/center] She went back to drawing.[/blockquote][/size] |
|
