Shenanigans [LELA]

[slayer]

-- scorpiusImperial [SI] began trolling uncannyAuxiliatrix[UA] --
SI: Angry pink texted human female.
SI: I require your assistance.
SI: I would frame this within the whole "I am literally your creator" sting.
SI: But that would make this entire sting far more creepy than in it needs to be.
SI: Which is not at fucking all.

[lelia]

-- uncannyAuxiliatrix[UA] replied to scorpiusImperial [SI] --

UA: douchefin, we meet again.
UA: but let us get past the jeering formalitys and the fact that yes, this is indeed creepy and slowly gaining in levels of creepiness.
UA: without as you put it "i am your creator" slang.
UA: now get on with it, i want to spend as little of my precious time as possible talking to scum like you.

[slayer]

SI: You are a very angry person.
SI: So I think you might understand where I am coming from.
SI: When I tell you that I think we should pretend to have blackrom feelings.
SI: For each other.
SI: That didn't make sense.
SI: I will try again.
SI: I attempted to confuse a friend, by saying I have blackrom feelings for a human.
SI: You. You are the human. Be proud.
SI: This is me politely requesting your assistance in this ruse.

[lelia]

UA: i am not usually an angry person.
UA: i make an exception for you.
UA: that is the definition for blackrom, no?
UA: ill need to know what it really is before i heartily accept this offer.
UA: aka im already jumping at the change to hate your pitiful guts.
UA: official quadrent stamp on it and all.

[slayer]

SI: Would you understand what I meant if I said "hatelust"?
SI: That is what we are dealing with here.
SI: There is a lot of hatred and mutual murderous intent involved.
SI: As well as copious amounts of wanting to be all over each other.
SI: We will only have to fake the latter.
SI: See? You want to hate me, we're already off to a good start.

[lelia]

UA: of course i understand such a thing.
UA: and of course the latter will be faked.
UA: unless you prove to have a worthful bone in your alien body.
UA: which is extremely doubtful.
UA: also yes.
UA: a very, very good start indeed.

[slayer]

SI: It occurs to me that I don't even know your name.
SI: Just because we are now resigned to a relentless cycle of hatred does not mean the social pleasantries can be ignored.
SI: I am Slaier, I think I said as much in my initial response to your friend's memo.
SI: I also happen to be the current ruler of my species.
SI: Does this constitute worthiness?

[lelia]

UA: nothing pleasant about pleasantries.
UA: especially with you in concern.
UA: windsor, lela windsor.
UA: grand ruler of felines and paper folding.
UA: as of current standing your worthiness is still below zero.
UA: last time i came in contact your species it was a blubbering mess.

[slayer]

SI: Felines?
SI: What is this "felines"?
SI: I do not speak for my comrades as individuals, but I am of the opinion that mutual cooperation between our two groups is the only way to succeed at this point.
SI: I am in the process of plotting Jack Noir's irrationally painful demise with the red text human as we speak.
SI: Or maybe not, I have no idea where on your timeline I've contacted you from.
SI: Either way. I would like to believe I am no longer a factor in the "blubbering".

[lelia]

UA: you do not know of felines? cats? kittens even?
UA: bloody hell.
UA: the last shred of hope i had left for you is gone.
UA: and now you and alex seem to be in some sort of cahoots.
UA: leaving your people in ruins.
UA: what a grand leader you are, no really, this isnt sarcasm leaking out of my very being not at all.
UA: tell me more about yours and alexs plan and perhaps that bit of hope can return.

[slayer]

SI: Oh, a cat.
SI: I would just like to assert that I am, in fact, an aquatic life form.
SI: Land creatures are as alien to me as I am to you.
SI: You misunderstand.
SI: I would never leave my people to die.
SI: I have given the Alex human whatever authority my position holds.
SI: This is to encourage the other trolls to stop being fucking imbeciles and do useful stings.
SI: It only occurred to me to do this after I realized that all of the rest of my race are dead.
SI: Because of me.
SI: You can see how I would have a vested interest in my species' continued existence, correct?

[lelia]

UA: i assume that i am in no position to ask if such a thing is actually legal in alternia.
UA: but given that your system is in shambles and you somehow killed them all off.
UA: i can sympathize with your interests for once.
UA: and only once.

[slayer]

SI: What I have done is grounds for execution.
SI: That is the gravity of the situation I find myself in.
SI: The death of my empire was tragic, sure.
SI: But the death of my race in it's entirety would be worse.
SI: Therefore I have pledged any and all assistance I can offer to your session.
SI: As I told the Alex human, if there is anything I can do to help you.
SI: I will quite literally risk death to do it.

[lelia]

UA: you say you will help us, yes.
UA: how so.
UA: also, if you slip anywhere throughout this plan.
UA: and put my race into harms way as you did to your own session.
UA: be assured that i will be the first to attempt to stop your "assistance".

[slayer]

SI: The death of all non-Hero trolls was unavoidable.
SI: I believe that my lusus was a form of evolutionary mechanism set against us long ago.
SI: But, do not worry. I will not let you die.
SI: Uh..you as in humans.
SI: The feelings on my end are black.
SI: I just want to make sure you understand that.